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Friday, July 07, 2006

Thoughts and Tears

One of my pastimes when I’m at home in Chennai is to sit on my house terrace and bask under the usually moonlit, starry and breezy, late night… just close my eyes, be a mute spectator to the random thoughts in their Brownian motion of my fluid memory. The randomness lies in the flow of the thoughts, which bring a smile on my face one moment, making its way to a tear or two the next second and again giggles of uncontrollable laughter vanishing into the redness of anger.

It is really very relaxing to just let my emotions free and let them run around like wild horses with me enjoying and reliving the moments again. And one would find me crying at that time. Those tears are neither of pain nor of joy. I feel they are simply a means of cleansing the mind, taking all the pains and sorrows with them as they flow down my cheeks leaving their salty streaks behind. They leave a sense of calmness in me.

I miss those moments here. I want more of solitude. But most of the time I find loneliness (in crowd). I can’t afford to drown in my thoughts because that would make people really question my sanity if they were to see me smile, laugh and cry all alone.

11 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hi,
Thanks, I learnt something from your post :-) The following links might clarify some stuffs to you as well. http://emotiontoolkit.com/loneliness.shtml and http://www.hindubooks.org/the_good_life/loneliness_and_solitude/page1.htm

pushkala said...

hey ..the tranquility that arises during such close encounters with emotions.. is often lost the moment we start acknowledge the presence of the tranquility!

beauty of soul is lost the moment u realise it! isnt it? !

cheers
pushkala

crsathish said...

nice way to relax. edhuku madam tears ? unga lonelinessukku oroo mudivu katunga.

Sen said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Sen said...

Hey,

There are two different ways to get rid of emotions either you CRY or LAUGH.They call this as Cathartic way of relieving emotions, Till now you've been doing the first one, try the second one.

Practice some humor at your work place, or be with some humorous bunch of people, all your emotions will be gone.

Its not an advice just an idea

Senthil

Deepa said...

@ anonymous

Thanks Anonymous!

btw, am curious as to what you learnt from my post.. is it the difference between solitude and loneliness?

@pushkala

beauty of soul is lost the moment u realise it! isnt it? !


I don think so, Pushkala... maybe one becomes insensitive to that beauty. But its beauty is never lost.


@ Sathish and Sen

I have already mentioned that my tears have nothing to do with sadness( or happiness for that matter).

and yea.. one should not and can never "get rid of emotions"
as long as s/he is a human being.

VJ said...

Hi, Yes :-) . I did learn the fine difference and many many other diverse ideas which my brain spawns right now. For example, I also learnt that the same physical state can give rise to two different mental projections based on how we perceive the physical state. So all emotions, feelings, meanings, prejudices etc attached to physical objects or transient thoughts, that we experience as humans, arises only within us. When we know the source, it should be possible to find a way to see things clearly without the effects of personal emotions. I liked the post.

Anil said...

jus gr8 thoughts... really in tune thoughts

Viswesh said...

Hi!
Scorpio to scorpio...

Anonymous said...

what happened no posts?

rahul said...

dont u get bored ... being alone ??? crying , laughing all to urself??